Full House Season 1, Episode 9: The Miracle of Thanksgiving

Check out that turkey. And the roasted bird.

It's 7 AM on Thanksgiving. Danny wakes Jesse up to tell him he has a problem and needs to see him downstairs. In the living room, Joey is sleeping on his little cot in the alcove. He wakes up and annoys Jesse with his enthusiasm for the day. Danny announces that his mom is snowed-in and can't cook their Thanksgiving dinner. Joey says they can take care of the dinner, due to the miracle of Thanksgiving. Danny says everything has to be perfect because it's the girls' first Thanksgiving since their mother died. The guys pledge to make the day great for the girls. 

Later in the kitchen, the guys stare slack-jawed at all the ingredients needed for dinner. Joey is reading through cookbooks and finds the instructions too overwhelming. They decide to make a restaurant reservation instead. The girls come downstairs and Danny breaks the news about Grandma. He then announces the restaurant plan, which makes DJ all mopey. She hates their idea because her mom always made a home cooked meal for Thanksgiving. DJ says she knows how to make the pumpkin pie, and that Grandma was going to put DJ in charge of the turkey anyway. The guys decide to pitch in with side dishes.

Food's ready, and the gang sets the table to "Get Ready" by the Temptations. In addition to cooking a full Thanksgiving dinner, everyone learned a four-minute choreography. The family thanks DJ for saving dinner. Joey and Jesse go to carve the turkey, but it's still frozen stiff. Danny is praising DJ when he gets the signal from Jesse and Joey that the turkey is frozen. DJ asks if her mom would have been proud of her, as everyone else in the room and the viewing audience cringe.

Danny goes to confer with the guys, and lies to DJ that her turkey is fine. He says he wants to put it back in the oven for a crispy skin, and cranks the heat up to like 700 degrees. The doorbell rings. Two ladies are at the door and happen to be carrying a cooked turkey with them. They got lost on the way to their uncle's house for dinner. Danny's ears perk up at the mention of hot turkey and he sends the girls upstairs. Danny and Joey want Jesse to work his magic and convince the ladies and the turkey to stay for dinner. Jesse asks them to stay, but the ladies say their husbands wouldn't be happy. And those husbands are where? Out in the car? Why are they sitting in the car if the ladies were so sure this was Uncle Whatshisface's house that they brought the hot turkey with them to the door? Danny offers them money for the turkey, and they start to haggle.

In the kitchen, Joey gets his tongue stuck in a bottle. He then gets the bottle stuck between the slats on the back of a chair, and notices smoke coming out of the oven. He runs into the living room screaming while holding the chair and scares the ladies off. Joey finally manages to get the guys into the kitchen, where they take turkey out of the oven. It looks like coal. DJ spots the turkey and flips. Danny admits it was frozen, which crushes DJ. Then Stephanie drops the pumpkin pie on the ground. It depresses me when desserts are wasted. Both girls run upstairs.

Up in Danny's room, DJ mopes that she let her mom down. Danny says her mom knew Thanksgiving isn't about turkey, but about family. Stitch that on a sampler, Danny. Also, cue the string orchestra. He says DJ brought the family together. They hug.

Jesse tells Stephanie everyone makes mistakes, and he wants to show her a mistake he made once. He pulls out a photo album and shows Stephanie photos of when he was five and let his sister Pam, Stephanie's mom, cut his hair. They come across a photo of Pam. DJ and Stephanie head off to make another pumpkin pie with new attitudes. Jesse quietly tells his sister's photo that she missed a great Thanksgiving. Danny comes in and sees the photos and wants to look at them, but Jesse tries to rush out. Danny realizes Jesse is struggling on his first Thanksgiving without his sister. Jesse finally breaks and wonders when the loss is going to stop hurting. Danny comforts him, saying the feeling never completely goes away. He tells Jesse he doesn't have to go through this alone. Jesse says it's hard for him to talk about, but Danny says talking about Pam helps him keep her close. Jesse shows Danny some more pictures from his childhood. Danny tells Jesse he's glad he's there. I punch myself in the face for tearing up at a Full House episode.

Around the table, the family says grace. Danny carves the turkey shell as the family starts passing around dishes.

***

Award for legitimately funny scene goes to: As much as I hate to award this to Joey, I always crack up when he screams after seeing the smoke coming out of the oven and then discovers the burning turkey.

Moments that generated tears: When Danny and Jesse talk about missing Pam; when Stephanie drops the pumpkin pie.

Line that generated homicidal urges: Joey repeatedly making a trumpet sound and saying "It's the miracle of Thanksgiving." (5 times)

First appearance of: Danny saying, "Give me my kid." The family's address, 1882 Gerard.

Episode rating: Despite the cheesy dance scene and grating trumpet imitations, this episode showed vast improvement over the last couple of stinkers. Bob Saget and John Stamos had a genuinely touching scene, and Joey, while never completely not annoying, did have a couple of humorous moments. I give this episode 3 out of 5 chiselled pieces of frozen turkey.

Photo source: stuffpoint.com